Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Marriage of different flavors
My husband and I are in some ways very much alike-- we are both type A overachievers. We have the same sense of humor, adore animals, love travel and value family. In most other ways, we are total opposites. I'm messy, he's not, I'm terrible at saving money, he never wants to spend it, I am not even marginally athletic, while sports and coordination come easily to him. None of these matter much-- but the one difference that seems vital in my mind is our approaches to food. Food is my life-- I spend all day every day studying nutrition, cooking, or talking about food. My darling husband would be perfectly happy to eat frozen pizza, oreos and lunch meat every day of his life. He has no interest in cooking or food preparation-- to the point where if there is nothing he can just grab from the fridge he often will just go hungry. He has been known to eat an entire box of cookies in one sitting because it's easier than figuring out what else to eat. To his credit, Marc will eat almost anything I put in front of him (though I get complaints if things have too much oil or garlic-- as if there could be such a thing!) but he does not rejoice in food the way I do. My Dad is worse in some ways because at least Marc will eat most vegetables and is not a picky eater-- my Dad has maybe five vegetables he is willing to put in his mouth, though he'd be happy if he never had to eat another plant in his life. (Although my Dad actually is a pretty good cook-- just as long as vegetables aren't involved). Dad likes to tease Marc about how hard his life must be having to eat my cooking (which is always based on vegetables). It is difficult for me not to try and control the diets of these men I care so much about. I often joke when we are at a party or family function and Marc is on his third serving of trans-fat laden dessert that you'd never know he was married to a nutritionist in training. I am trying to let go of this expectation that one day he will scream in rapture over ginger salmon and quinoa-cranberry pilaf with apple braised chard for dinner and learn to be grateful that at least he eats it without complaint.