Compulsivity

I have a kind of a compulsive personality. It's a good thing I don't particularly enjoy drinking beyond a glass or two of wine and I've never done any kind of recreational drug. I get compulsively into things I enjoy: I check my email over and over, I start cleaning and then everything has to be perfect, I buy a shirt I like and then decide I need three of them etc. One of the most absorbing is when I get into a book-- especially when it is a series. This has happened a few times: first I read all of the Left Behind series in a couple of days. I got into reading Harry Potter right before the fifth book came out and I also read all of those in a few days as well-- I have also re-read the Harry Potter series four or five times. I get so absorbed I really can't do anything else until I finish the whole series. I know this about myself, and so when several of my girlfriends came back from Spring Break having read the Twilight series I knew I couldn't start reading them until the quarter was over. It's a good thing, because I did nothing for the past three days but read those books-- I got completely lost in them. I also am a fast reader, and it is because of this that I can re-read books a couple of times, because I often don't retain the details on the first read through-- I get the gist but I'm so excited to find out what happens that I don't savor the pages. I also have been staying up too late and waking up unrefreshed. I'm trying to stop myself from immediately re-reading all four books.

This applies to other aspects of my life as well-- I struggle with eating mindfully and with being happy with what I have instead of wanting things I don't need. It's a constant battle to try and be in the moment in all aspects of my life, but it's something I'm working on.